Dream On, Mama!

I am one who does better when I have a clear dream that I'm working towards.  I wilt when I lose sight of something more. I think that's true of all of us, though.  It's easy to get caught up in the routines of life, the tasks at hand, all of the things that demand our time and attention in the here and now, and simply lose touch of the dreams we carry  on our hearts. It takes a pretty high level of intentionality to stay in touch with those dreams and even more deliberate work to keep moving towards them.  There is probably no greater and more important work that I can do daily but to stay in touch with the dreams and visions that God has placed in my heart, carefully listening for next steps, and acting on what I know to do.

My daughter, who was 9 at the time, told me once to "Dream On, Mama!"  She meant it not in a cynical way, but in the purest sense. She's wired a bit like me; she has big ideas and big dreams for her life.  This struck me as encouraging because not only did it affirm my sense of dreaming and believing for more, but it reminded me of how much those around us need us to keep dreaming.  I think our culture has a way of neutering our dreams.  If we're not careful, we can unconsciously begin to opt for status quo and we can easily trade in our God-Given Dreams for the American Dream. Our families, friends, communities and the world need me, and you,  to be fully alive in our dreams and visions. Not only do we make a difference in the lives of others as we pursue our God given dreams, hopefully we are reflecting a piece of God's heart to the world around us.

Today, may our souls awaken to not only the God given dreams on our hearts, but to the things that we haven't yet dreamed of.

Lessons from Monkeys

Here's how you trap a monkey:  secure a dried, hollowed out gourd to a tree and place a piece of fruit on the inside of the gourd.  What happens is that a monkey will reach his hand into the gourd, grab tightly to the fruit, only to find that the hole is too small to get his clutched fist out through it.  Of course, the monkey doesn't realize that if he'd simply let go, he could be free.  This practice is used in some Asian cultures to capture monkeys to eat.

I'm reminded of the importance of surrendering, letting go, being willing to give up the transitory for the sake of the transcendent. Jesus said,  "If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give it up for me, you will find it" (Mt. 10:39).  Many cultures and religious traditions have wisely associated surrender and sacrifice with redemption and renewal.

Its so easy to fiercely clutch those things that are important to us.  I know I'm capable of holding onto something so tightly that I can miss the bigger thing that could occur by letting go.

I visited the National Cathedral in Washington DC and took this picture. Interesting how a piece of carpeting could speak so clearly to me...God uses the most unsuspecting things at times!  Anyways, the imagery reminds me that only if a grain of wheat dies, will it eventually produce bread just as grapes can't produce wine without losing their identity as grapes (Jesus's words, from John 12). Being willing to let go can be what allows for the "more" that God may want to bring.

“What are you willing to give up to ensure your own unfolding, and the unfolding of what is holy in your life?” (Gregg Levoy, Callings)

Detours

The other day we were going out of town for the day, and came to a sign along the highway that said "road closed ahead".  I never believe those signs. Sometimes signs like that have been posted and I have still managed to get through the roadblock.  So, we drove around the roadblock hoping that the sign really didn't mean what it said, only to find that indeed the road was closed.  Literally, a whole bridge was out. No way around that one.  We turned around and made our way back to the designated detour route which took us on narrow, bumpy, country roads.  Eventually we made it back to the highway. I really don't like detours. They are inconvenient, and just plain annoying.

Life has a way of imposing its own roadblocks.  There's been times in my life when I'm going along...everything is going fine and good... just like I've planned...got a good job...making money... relationships are good....I'm on track with my sense of call and purpose... and.then... BAM.  Roadblock.

In some ways, our life seems to be on a bit of a detour right now.  Seems like a season during which God is saying, "lay it all down, just wait, trust me to lead you, I know were you're going even if you don't see clearly right now."

That can be hard.

So here's what I'm learning about the detour times of life:

• My nature is to strongly dislike roadblocks and detours and to do everything possible to get around them.  I don't like things that mess with my plans and sense of where I'm going. Yet,
• Roadblocks are an opportunity to meet God and experience God in a profound way, in ways that I might not have otherwise
• Roadblocks are an opportunity to redeem the time and find meaning and joy in different and new ways.
• Maybe the roadblock isn't even about me so much as it is about someone else and what God is doing in them.
• A roadblock doesn't have to change my life mission... I am still to be about loving God and loving others.  Those things do not change during a detour.
• A roadblock can be for our own protection, keeping us from a painful or devastating situation.

We all experience roadblocks and what feels like a detour.  Maybe rather than fighting and resisting them, we learn to embrace them and ask, "What is it that God wants to do in me and through me during this time?" And learn to see life's detours as the gifts that they can be. And, for me, to see the detour not as a side or alternative path, but to embrace it as the best and the right path.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths."  Proverbs 3:5-6

Dreams Do Come True

Our recent trip to Europe was just that; a dream come true.  I've wanted to take the family to Europe for a very long time and at times it just seemed like it would never happen.  Yet, I kept hoping and believing that the desire was planted in my heart for a reason. I realize a trip to Europe might not  appear to be a world changer kind of dream, but you never know what God might do yet.  Time will tell on that one.  Plus, I think that God's love towards us might be just motivation enough for God... you know, fulfilling a dream simply as a way of saying, "I love you!".

The dreams, hopes and visions that we carry in our hearts are sacred, yet often elusive.  Why is it that some dreams do seem to "come true", and others don't?  As I've considered this for my own life, some of the things that I thought were hopes and dreams really didn't stand the test of time.  With time, they faded and if it weren't for my old journals to remind me, I wouldn't even remember many of them.  But there are hopes and dreams I've carried in my heart for a long time, that have stood the test of time and seasons, that have either come true, or I believe still will. At times I'm more aware of those dreams than others, but they are always there, in the recesses of my heart, reminding me that there is more ahead.  And I believe that it matters because I believe God planted those hopes and dreams in my heart.  

I believe God gives all of us hopes and dreams.... ideas and thoughts and passions that he places uniquely in our hearts because  they are key to what God wants to do in us and through us to impact the world around us. Dreams are important.  They are part of our destiny and design.  And therefore I think its worth spending the time to figure out what our dreams really are. For me, its been helpful to look back over the years to see which dreams have always been there, albeit at times under the surface and barely cognizant to me, those dreams that continue to rise to the surface of my spirit. I know that if those dreams are to be realized, it will take work, risk, sacrifice and a whole lot of only what God can do.  I always think that if there's any chance of my dreams being realized AND making a difference in the world, then I'm pretty dependent on God to lead  and guide me in that direction.  I figure since it's God who puts the dreams in our heart in the first place, he might even be invested in seeing those dreams realized in and through us!  That's re-assuring to me and keeps me hoping and believing.

Today, may each of us move more fully towards those hopes and dreams that lie within our hearts.

 “All holy desires grow by delay; and if they diminish by the delay, then they were never holy desires.” (St. Gregory)

Europe 2011

We just got back from a two week trip to Europe with the family!  I've dreamed of this trip for a very long time.Over the years, I recall times of wanting to travel to Europe so badly I could hardly stand it, but were unable to for various reasons.  As I reflect on it now, I see that NOW was the perfect timing.  Any earlier and it would have been just that- too early. God has a way of working things out such that the timing is always better with God than if it was left to me to determine!  In fact, it seems that in God's reality, things always take longer than anticipated but its worth the wait because He brings a fullness that just wouldn't be there otherwise. For us, in this situation, the fullness had to do with the kids being old enough to engage the trip and be more significantly influenced by it, as one example.

The renovated and staged kitchen

Last Fall, we purchased a house in foreclosure that needed some TLC.  I've always wanted to do this; buy a house, fix it up and put it back on the market.  I've looked at a lot of different properties over time, but either the house wasn't the right one, or the timing wasn't right.  Last fall, we found the right house and it was the right time!  Our offer was accepted and we got possession the first of December. We spent all of December, including Christmas Break working on it (the kids thought they were the only kids in the world who had to work over Christmas Break). We put it back on the market in mid-January. We took a risk.We worked hard. It was inconvenient at times. We were uncertain what the outcomes would be in this economy.  But all along we had a deep sense that somehow this was something that God was doing in our lives.We hoped that if the outcome was good, we could take a big trip somewhere.

The house sold in short order.  We were able to take this trip.  Dreams do come true.  But more on that later.

Leave Deeply Missed, part 2

Dad and Mom with my daughter

I was thinking about people that I personally know who model this principle to me of leaving deeply missed (see yesterday's post).  One of the people who came to mind is my own dad.

Dad had a rough start in life which led to some serious orneriness as he became a school aged boy (I didn't let him tell my own boys the stories until they became old enough to know better than to emulate their much admired Grandpa!).  Often in trouble at his little country school, the teacher's were unable to see the raw potential in him.  In seventh grade, he went to see the school guidance counselor about his future. The guidance counselor told Dad that he would never amount to much of anything and that the best he could probably do would be to become a mechanic. Hard to comprehend, but true.  That interaction, while hurtful to the core, became a motivation to prove everyone wrong.

Dad went on in life willing to work hard for every penny he earned.  He started out by delivering eggs. He was the best egg delivery man there ever was, I'm sure. Eventually he landed a job in a small but growing tool and die company.  There, he began to see possibilities for his life that he had never seen before (see my earlier post, "You Can't Be What You Can't See"). As Dad, because of his integrity, strong work ethic and good inter-personal skills, began to move up the ladder in this organization he began to catch a vision of one day not only being an employee but of being a business owner himself.

Eventually the opportunity presented itself and Dad, with Mom by his side in it all,  started his own business. Dad would often get up at 3 AM to be at work before any of the other employees.  He'd plan and organize the day, the work, and his strategy for growing the business.Everything Dad did came out of his passion for the business and his passion for people..  His guiding principles became:

• Always go the extra mile; don't just meet people's expectations, exceed them
• Do for others what I would want them to do for me; reward generously those employees who work hard and give their best
• Follow through and do what I say I will do; if I said a product would be delivered in 1 week, then it will be delivered in a week at all costs
• Always be honest; no BS'ing anyone, if I don't know the answer just admit it.
• Care about people for who they are; don't just care about them because they keep the business going.
• Be generous; the business is blessed to be a blessing so no hoarding allowed

Dad worked hard and gave it his best. He was able to retire early, having built a very successful business that impacted not only the business world, but the lives of his employees, customers, and those who benefited from Mom and Dad's generosity.  Dad sold the business to someone he knew who would take good care of it.  The day he walked out of the doors of the business he and Mom had built for the last time, he left a hole so big that no one could possibly begin to fill it.  This many years later, people still talk about how much they miss Dad running the business. He left deeply missed.

Thanks, Dad and Mom, for your incredible example of giving whatever you did your very best!  I am blessed to have been in the front row as I have watched you live out your exceptional values and principles.  

Leave Deeply Missed

This morning I happened to catch the last part of the Today show, just in time to see the farewell for  Meredith Vieira on her last day with the show.  It was very moving and inspiring for me.  Clearly,  she was well loved by many.  The kind, honoring and loving words spoken of and to her indicated a deep appreciation for who she is and what she brought to the show.  Behind the scenes, she worked hard, was committed, showed up every day (at 2:30 AM no less!)  fully present and ready to engage, and to bring all that she was to the table, so to speak.  She gave it her best and she gave all she could for the 5 years she was there.

It's a great reminder that whatever sphere we are given in life, give it the best. Whether that sphere is a family, a job, a calling, a place to volunteer- it doesn't really matter- just show up fully alive, present and ready to give our all.  Most of us won't achieve celebrity status in the spheres we serve, but we can, at the end of the day, know that we lived and loved in a way that deeply touched and impacted the lives of those around us.  And hopefully when we leave for the last time, it will be evident that we lived, loved and served in such a way that we will  be deeply missed.